A little fowl fun. Turkey or goose?
While the old birds shopped for Christmas presents, Felix and Mort made their annual Black Friday visit to the local tavern to plan Christmas dinner. They’d taken charge of the cooking years ago, and ever since the first year – when they’d admittedly ruffled a few feathers – the girls happily had left them to it.
They pored over recipes and shared reviews while Phil, the barkeep, kept the bourbon flowing. Felix spread out his clippings and arranged them into piles. “Time to talk turkey.”
Phil leaned on the bar. “Having turkey this year?”
“Goodness no!” Mort shook his head so hard his chin wobbled. “Goose! We always recommend goose.”
Phil raised an eyebrow. “What about Christmas traditions?”
“I’ll have you know, goose has a very long history.” Felix searched for the magazine article. “All the way back to the ancient Egyptians. Did you know that Marco Polo reported seeing geese in China? And Queen Elizabeth ordered that goose be served every Michaelmas in honor of her victory over the Spanish Armada.”
“But what about Ben Franklin?” the barkeep pointed out. “He was a big fan of turkey.”
“A turkey if there ever was one.” The two cooks laughed. “He should have stopped at electricity.”
“Nothing beats goose,” Mort said. “Goose fat has a far better flavor than peanut oil. Some people even save it for cooking. Did you know you can buy pure goose fat on Amazon?”
Phil shook his head. “My wife hates all the grease.”
“Aah…” Felix said, taking Phil under his wing. “But everything about roasted goose tops turkey. The skin is crispy. A goose is juicier than a turkey, and its dark, succulent flesh has a distinctively rich flavor all its own, with just the right amount of gaminess. Most importantly, the meat isn’t dry; it flakes off the bone.”
Mort’s beady eyes turned dreamy. “Alongside the golden goose, I’m thinking airy potato dumplings, red cabbage, and a baked apple with lingonberries. And apple sausage stuffing.”
“And liver paté,” Felix added, waving a recipe like a flag.
Mort sifted through the piles. “Shredded confit! Or we can pack the meat into pastries for deep-fried goose spring rolls.”
Phil replenished their bourbon and slid a recipe from the pile nearest him. “Goose crown pink with celeriac and cranberries. I don’t even know what that means, but it sounds good.”
Felix sighed. “We need to make a decision and get our ducks in a row. How about classic orange and thyme-scented goose? With all Mort’s fixings.”
“Sounds perfect.” Mort beamed. “We should slow-roast for 4-5 hours at 120C. We’ll still get crispy skin, but the breast will stay tender. Then for the last half hour, we’ll turn the temperature up to 220C.”
“You’ve convinced me,” Phil said, topping off their glasses. “I’m trying goose this year.”
“Your wife will love it.” Felix grinned and swayed on his perch. “Oh, my. I’m feeling loose as a goose!” He rested a wing on the bar, holding himself up.
Phil helped them gather up their recipes. “Time for you two turkeys to head home or your gals are going to cook your gooses.”
With a laugh, the two strutted from the bar, wattles wagging and tail feathers fanned. “We did it,” Felix chortled. “Another successful convert.”
“It was easy.” Mort danced a little turkey trot. “He was a sitting duck.”
Myths of the Mirror 
Happy Thanksgiving 🎉
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Thank you, and Happy Holidays to you. 🙂
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Thank you. Hope to see your next post soon
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This story brought a smile and laughter – I sent it to my colleagues in Czech. They are all fans of goose and duck but don’t know much about turkey. We have St. Martin’s Day in Europe, and in Czech, it is the tradition to have roast goose and drink young red wine from Moravia. This post reminds me of arguments people had before 11/11 about whether or not to serve duck instead of goose. I am a duck person, love it, and it is our family tradition to have roast duck for Christmas but definitely turkey for Thanksgiving! I love the holiday season even though, once again not in the States to enjoy it, I can get it through stories like this! Cheers, and thank you, Diana, for this.
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What a fun comment! I’m so glad you shared the story – internationally too! I was amazed at how many phrases in English are fowl related, and it was a blast to fit them into the story without giving these two turkey’s identifies away. I enjoy both goose and duck, so I’d have a feast on St. Martin’s Day either way. Enjoy the flavors of the holidays wherever you are!
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I hope you had a great Thanksgiving 🙂
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We did. It was busy going from house to house this year with a nutty schedule, but it’s my favorite holiday. I love the celebrating gratitude.
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♥️♥️♥️
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Happy Belated Thanksgiving Diana, I’ve been traveling and just now catching up on the blogs I follow. You’ve been dealing with so much. I hope you had a restive Thanksgiving Day. I’m nestled in my chair, computer in my lap, warmed by a new layer of winter fat! We had a delicious day. Hugs, C
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Lol. We did have a wonderful Thanksgiving. Though we had it officially on Friday due to scheduling conflicts. I think I had 3 Thanksgivings, in fact. So I can relate to the layer of winter fat. 🙂 I hope you had a wonderful day as well. Hugs.
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Cute story, Diana! Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Now you’ll start decorating for Christmas!
We had salmon for Thanksgiving this year. Mercy and Will are vegetarian but eat salmon. Come to think of it, I ate turkey but never a goose. Does it taste like chicken? I’m with my sister from Hong Kong at her daughter and son-in-law’s house in Vancouver. We’ll have lunch with the new bride, my other sister, and her newly wedded husband. They’ll fly to Vancouver from Victoria (an 8-minute flight!!!). When they flew to Victoria from Los Angeles, they hadn’t come through customs because it’s not a major city. They have to fly to Vancouver to go through customs, then stay here for a few days before flying back to LA. I’m going back to CA on Wednesday.
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I was just visiting your site this morning and didn’t see anything new, so I figured that you’ve been super busy. Goose probably tastes closer to duck, Miriam, but salmon works too! How fun that you spent Thanksgiving with Mercy and Will, and then jet-setting up to Canada for more family fun. I hope you’ve enjoyed every moment of it. Safe travels home. ❤
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Probably I like goose better than turkey, Diana! Dark meat tastes richer than white meat.
I’ll be busy for a while longer. Thank you for checking my blog. 😍
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I like the dark meat better too. And yup, you have a lot going on! Just take your time and don’t get too stressed. It will all work out.
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Geoff put you up to it, didn’t he? 😀 Actually, that game was a little tame by his standards…
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I had to head over and take a look. It was fun with fowl language over here, Chelsea. I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving. 🙂
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I don’t eat any meat and we don’t celebrate Thanksgiving here. Love the story, though! Thanks, Diana!
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Thanks for stopping by to read, Olga. Mort and Felix cheer you on for your compassionate diet. And they’re glad you enjoyed the story. 🙂
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I am on the verge of becoming a vegetarian, but Christmas won’t be the same without turkey!
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We’re moving in that direction too and eat a lot less meat than we used to. We did have turkey on Thanksgiving, but a mushroom cassarole with cranberry sauce sounds pretty good too! 🙂 Thanks for stopping by, my friend. Have a wonderful week.
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It’s looking better by the minute… XX
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Very cute story, Diana. I’ve never tried goose. It’s too late for Thanksgiving but maybe the turkeys have a point. I actually like the dry white turkey meat, though. It’s a great excuse to pour more gravy on it. 🙂 Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.
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Here here to the excuse for more gravy! 😛
Happy belated Thanksgiving, Peach! Sorry for jumping in on your comment, Marsha. 🙂
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Ha ha. Any time, Betsy. Thanks for reading!
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Thanks for jumping in. I hope you landed in the gravy! Well maybe just part of you. I would be pretty gooey. But I do love it. 🙂
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Haha. Gooey, indeed. But tasty! 😉
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indeed
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Ha ha ha. I was just telling my husband that the cranberry sauce is my favorite part of Thanksgiving, but gravy is right up there too. Lol. Thanks so much for reading and I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Happy Holidays, my friend.
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For a non-thanksgiving dinner tonight, we went out for Vince’s birthday and I had bourbon glazed salmon with cranberries. I thought I was eating candy! Mmmmmm
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LOL. That sounds amazing. I need to get more cranberries before the season ends. 🙂 And some bourbon!
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It was amazing!
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I like sweet/savory and hot/cold combos. Cranberries fits the bill.
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YEP! Have a great December, Diana.
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[…] Head over to enjoy this wonderful story: Diana Peach – Myths of the Mirror – Talking Turkey […]
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Thanks so much for sharing the story, Sally. Hugs.
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Wonderful story. I loved the twisdt.
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Thanks, Molly. I decided to go with something on the light side for the start of the holidays. I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your loved ones. 🙂
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I had a wonderful time. Thank you.
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Hope you had a terrific Thanksgiving, Diana.
I’m now imagining this fun piece with turkeys and geese sitting at the bar discussing how to roast succulent tofu! 😉🤔
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That would be a great conversation – a Thanksgiving vegetarian recipe discussion in the farm yard. I’d be all for that. Thanks for reading, my friend. Have a wonderful week.
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Yeah… you too, dear Diana!
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Happy Thanksgiving Dina
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Thank you so much for the visit and Thanksgiving wish, Celestine. I hope you’re well. Hugs.
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Happy Thanksgiving, Diana! Loved the short story. i prefer ham or chicken. 🙂
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Thanks so much for the visit and comment, Mark. We had a turkey over here even though Mort and Felix were pushing for goose. 🙂 Have an excellent week, my friend.
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Thank you for sharing the story!!… a stress free, mess free Thanksgiving here, a microwave meal, nothing with feathers… 🙂
Hope you have the mostest, bestest Happiest Thanksgiving ever and until we meet again..
May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life’s passing seasons
bring the best to you and yours!
(Irish Saying)
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Thanks so much for reading, Larry. I’m glad you got a chuckle. And I hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful while it was stress free. 😀
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That story was so much fun! I am actually having roast duck, red cabbage, stuffing, and German potato salad.
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That sounds wonderful, Bonnie. What a great meal. I’m glad you enjoyed the silly story. I wanted to head into the holidays on a light note. Have a lovely day of gratefulness with your loved ones. Happy Thanksgiving. 🙂
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Oh! You really had me going there. I thought this was your sneaky way of posting a recipe! Love it. 😀
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Me… cook… ?? I love a great meal, but one of those rarely comes from my kitchen. It was fun browsing recipes though. I’m glad you enjoyed the silliness. I wanted to head into the holiday seaon on a light note. ❤ ❤ ❤
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-giggles- it’s a light note that hits all the right chords. 😀
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[…] to D. Wallace Peach’s hysterical post from Sunday about cooking turkey. Here is the link: https://mythsofthemirror.com/2022/11/20/talking-turkey/. Keep […]
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Thanks so much for sharing the post, Bernadette. I’m so glad you got a laugh. Hugs. And Happy Thanksgiving!
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Don’t forget Waldorf Salad. Grandma made the best salad and served it in a carnival glass bowl. I missed that so much.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, my friend.
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Well go ahead an make one, my friend. You don’t need to wait for next year. Food is such a wonderful connection to family traditions and brings back lovely memories. Thanks for stopping by and enjoy a week of gratitude, my friend.
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So cute. Happy Thanksgiving, my friend.
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Thanks for stopping by, my friend, and same to you. We’re planning a quiet holiday, but full of gratefulness…. and turkey. 🙂
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Loved this….so cute!! Have a Happy Thanksgiving!!
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Thanks, Kirt. A little silliness to kick off the holiday season. I’m glad you enjoyed the story, and Happy Thanksgiving. ❤
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Hahaha, this was funny – we don’t do thanksgiving here but we do know a LOT about it from all the media, this really made me chuckle. I liked the little twist at the end, it made me chuckle. Reading this light-hearted piece also made me very hungry. Airy potato dumplings?! I had never heard of those, and when I did a quick google it had me drooling. Going to try my hand at them at some point. I hope you have a happy thanksgiving!
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I’m glad you enjoyed the story, Lenora. I’ve never made potato dumplings but as I was browsing recipes for the story, I found all kinds of yummy stuff. It made me hungry too. And who knew how many idioms there were referencing turkeys, geese, and ducks. It was rather astonishing! I hope you make some potato dumplings one day, my friend. Hugs.
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I never really knew what people eat for Thanksgiving – just knew there was a tonne of food – and having a look through recipes did NOT disappoint. I hope your Thanksgiving is peaceful and surrounded by love.
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❤ ❤
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Personally, I would never share a drink with a turkey. Just don’t trust them, but I would definitely have one over for dinner.
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Ha ha ha. I hope you’re having a turkey over for dinner this week, Greg. But if they turn you down, geese should be quite welcome at the table too. Thanks for the visit and for making me laugh. 😀 Happy Thanksgiving.
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I love it! I didn’t see that end coming, but it was perfect!
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I was trying not to spoil the ending, Ann, so I’m glad it worked. It’s amazing how many sayings in English include fowl language. I had a blast incorporating them. Thanks for stopping by and Happy Thanksgiving. 🙂
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Such a compelling piece with an air of hilarity. Appetizing all the same. Geese and turkeys should find themselves cachettes this festive season 😄
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I feel a little sorry for the fowl at this time of year, Lamittan, but celebrating thankfulness still makes it my favorite holiday. I’m glad you had a laugh and wish you a wonderful week. 😀
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Indeed, my dear friend D. Have a fabulous week too. 🤗
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Happy Thanksgiving, Diana. I keep eyeing those goose next tonthe turkeys. Someday.
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I really like goose, Denise, but they’re much smaller than turkeys, so not good for more than four people. If you’re ever doing a small celebration, I recommend giving it a try. Thanks for the visit and Happy Thanksgiving. ❤ ❤
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