On Sunday, I’m off to visit the old folks (older than me anyway) in the Colorado high desert.
My parents haven’t acquired any of those new-fangled gadgets like wireless “internets” and email is still on par with magic. Their town is devoid of coffee shops because those places attract liberal, tree-hugging, Bernie supporters (like me). Needless to say, I will be offline for a couple weeks.
I’ll probably be engaged in manual labor, which is my father’s idea of family fun. Last summer he had my brother and me trekking into the hills and hauling rocks for his stone wall. I think we made 30 trips with the old Subaru and transported 200 rocks before dad attempted to jump a gulch and ripped off the back end of the car.
My brother won’t be making this trip as the volcano in Alaska’s Aleutian Islands has him grounded. So, I’m on my own. Think of me while I’m dragging dead branches out of federally-owned land, piling them on top of the same Subaru, hauling them home, and cutting them up for firewood. (The trees are that little fringe of dark stuff on the top of the mountain in the photo).
My mom is legally blind, so the rest of the time will be spent talking about their eventual move to Oregon over my dad’s dead body, and I’ll be cleaning the house. She does an amazing job considering, but she needs help, and these stubborn proud people refuse to allow help in the house. Actually, they do hire help, and then my mom says she can do a better job herself and chases them out asks them to leave.
My dad is hard at hearing, and since only old people wear hearing aids, he clearly doesn’t need them (he’s 87). The television volume is set on nuclear, and he’ll be ranting about Trump, while my mother and I shout at each other over the noise. We’ll be sharing the sofa with nine cats. It will be so relaxing.
I will be completely absent from blogland and anything resembling a normal life for the duration of the visit. Wish me luck. I’ll be back in two weeks.
P.S. For the sake of family peace, it is my daughterly duty to advise you that this post is the pure unadulterated truth grossly exaggerated. 🙂
Best of luck! You might a get a good story out of the visit. Who really knows what’s living in federally-owned land?
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I imagine I will have a story or two to tell. (Hopefully no stranded vehicle stories). Ha ha. Thanks for the wishes for luck. I may need it!
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I think I’d like your parents and the town they live in. I bet you have fun, despite all that annoying physical exercise (which I try to avoid). I’ll miss you.
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It’s fun for a while, Jacqui, and geologically it’s a fascinating part of the country. But it’s isolated. Great for an outdoor explorer and reader, bad if you want to eat out or catch a movie! Have a great couple weeks. I’m going to miss everyone too!
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Hope you have a safe, happy trip! Say hi to your folks from everyone in blog land! 😊
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I will, Kelly. I’m not a fan of flying, but once I’m on the ground, it’s all good. I’m hoping to indulge in some reading and will get plenty of sunshine too. 😀
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It sounds like heaven.
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Ha ha. It will be good for some stories, that’s for sure. I’m looking forward to the adventure. Have a great weekend!
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Hilarious – long live stubborn and proud old folks. At least you won’t have to go around filed shovelling horse manure for the vegetable patch, Diana (my father’s allocated job for us on our visits). Have a good break from all the new-fangled gadgets.
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Oh no no. Shoveling cow manure into the garden is a given, Judith. Ha ha. We did it as kids too. My dad would get a truckload dumped in the yard every spring. The smell still reminds me of spring and I get all nostalgic. LOL. So glad I evoked some memories for you too!
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hi very good article.
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Thanks for the visit. I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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Bwahahaha! Diana, this post is so funny. Both my parents live with me, albeit, in a separate cottage, so I can relate to this so well. I hope you have a wonderful time, it looks so different and beautiful!
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I can imagine that you relate. My parents lived with us when we lived in Vermont and it was… hard and wonderful and insane. Ha ha. Perhaps I’ll get some reading in while I’m out there!
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I hope so. Have a lovely time.
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Enjoy the break!
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Thanks, Arlene. Packing today and then off tomorrow morning. We’ll have fun together. 😀
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Enjoy!
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To laugh or to cry, that is the question. Diana, it’s what we do. Think of the stories you will have to tell us and write about when you return. Safe travels!
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Thanks, Jennie. It’s all good for a laugh. We have to keep our senses of humor, and appreciate the poignancy of aging. My folks are fiercely independent, and that’s good, I think. I will make sure it’s a wonderful visit. 😀
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I’m sure you will. I look forward to reading about it. Somehow I envision a post with lots of humor coming our way. Best to you!
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No wonder you developed a place you can call home: Fantasy. I’m glad your parents are still with us. 🙂
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Hi Frank. Sorry for the late reply – I found your comment in spam this morning. Yes, the old folks are still around but slowing down considerably. We had a peaceful time without any dangerous adventures! Have a great weekend, my friend. 😀
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No wonder you developed a place you can call home: Fantasy. I’m glad your parents are still with us. 🙂
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Me too. They’re quirky and they love me. I’ll take that any day, even with all the challenges that come with age (theirs and mine). 😀
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Funny how that relationship, be it mother-daughter or father-daughter, always carries elements of what it always has since childhood. Strange to be a grandparent or great-uncle or whatever … and still have “mum” looking in to make sure you’re eating properly.
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I left home at 17, Erik, and somehow that’s where I’m stuck. Whenever I go back they treat me like I’m 17. It’s hysterical. And my mom is overflowing with advice always!!!
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I love this post. And it may be hard work when you visit, but just think of the extra muscles you’ll develop.
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Thanks, Cynthia. I won’t be sitting in my recliner with a laptop all day, so there’s a good chance I’ll drop a few pounds. I love the outdoors, and it’s a good way to escape the TV, too. 😀
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Just think how delicious writing will feel when you get back …
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So true! I’m going to do a little freehand brainstorming too. The muse is coming with me. 🙂
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I loved every word Diana! My heart goes out to you … Enjoy every moment of their quirkiness … and remember that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree 😉
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Ha ha. I do enjoy it, Val, and I just laugh at the antics. The folks won’t be around forever, and despite how much as they drive me crazy, these visits are precious. I have lots of great stories and memories to share. ❤
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You are a hoot!
Enjoy the cleaning, cutting, and chopping wood. And you call that a vacation? You’ll be ready to escape into make- believe stories when you get back.
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It’s just like this, Sheron. No kidding. Yes, some time for solitary contemplation while I’m chain-sawing! Maybe the muse will stop by and help 🙂 Thanks for laughing along.
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Lol Diana, you had me loling through this post. It sounds like you have your work cut out for you and I’m willing to bet all that fresh air might give you some new book ideas. I think we could all use a vacation where we are forced to step away from the computer! Oh, and I loved the part about your dad and his rebel against hearing aids and TVs on nuclear levels, lol. My hub is in need of one of those gadgets, but of course he stands firm that he doesn’t need one. LOL ❤ Enjoy!
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I do most of my brainstorming and plotting by free hand, Debby. I don’t know exactly why, but there’s something about scribbling in the margins that works for me. I hope to come home with the start of an outline :-D. The rest is just going to be old Peach-antics. Never a dull moment. Glad you got a nice laugh out of it!
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Wow, another margin scribbler! That’s what I do too. As I’m writing my thoughts jump ahead so the margins are the perfect place to rest them til I can get to them. 🙂 Enjoy your little getaway! ❤
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Yes! I love my laptop, but it will never replace the feel of “jotting things down.”
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I write in the margins and use arrows pointing all over the place. It is the only way I can “concept” a story line.
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I appreciate the impact of your disclaimer that this account of the pure and unadulterated truth was grossly exaggerated. 😉
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Actually… this is all pretty much the truth, Andy. I’ll never forget the sight of my brother dragging parts of the car out of the gulch. The bottom panel that protects the underside of the car was completely scraped off along with the rear fender and wheel wells. We were about 30 miles from the nearest help. Lots of crazy stories out there and more to come, I’m sure. Thanks for the visit!
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I loved the use of strikethrough in this!
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Thanks Erik. I was chuckling as I wrote this and had even more of them, but it was too much. They’ll get a kick out of the post when I read it to them. It’s nothing they haven’t heard or experienced. 😀
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Bright side : manual labor = great forearms 😀
Hope you have a great time at your parents!
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True! I actually like manual labor and it’s a nice break from the loud TV inside. I’m sure we’ll have plenty of fun between the chores. 😀
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Sending lots of love your way… ❤ xo
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Thanks, Bette. We’ll have fun and won’t do anything too dangerous. They love the visits and I love them, so all is well. ❤
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This made me chuckle….so so funny. Have fun 😉
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I’ll do my best. Never a dull moment over there. I have a lot of stories and I’m sure there will be a few more. Thanks for the encouragement!
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Can’t wait to hear them.
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All the best for this trip… 😉 Safe journey!
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The worst part is the flight, Iris, since I’m not a bird. The rest is a piece of cake and good for a laugh. I’m lucky to have the time with them. 😀
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My greetings to them from down under, Diana. ❤😀
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I remember visits back home to my husband’s grandfather’s house. Every time we went to visit, his grandfather had him cut down a couple of trees and me picking up limbs. That ended after one of the trees crashed onto the corner of his back porch. This caused a little damage, and Papa had to hire someone to fix it. He never put us to work again. 😀
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Ha ha ha. That’s so funny and what a great idea. Hmmm. Unfortunately there aren’t any trees around the house. I’ll have to be more creative. Actually, I don’t mind the chores – they break up the inside time with the TV blaring. 😀
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Diana, laughing out loud at the strikeouts! Yep, you’ll need a break to recover from taking a break from your break! You are definitely a good daughter! 💛Christine
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I just try to see the humor in the craziness, Christine. And the visits make for good stories. They really are this wild and the poor car takes the brunt of it. I’m sure we’ll be doing something reckless and daring during my visit. 😀
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Ha ha! You are blessed Diana…you are off to the island of love…such summers are rare in the lives of many people. Have a wonderful break dear friend. Stay blessed 🙂
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I complain, Balroop, but it’s all in fun. My parents are a bit nutty, but they won’t be around forever, and we have to fill ourselves up with good memories and laughs. Thanks for wishing me off with your blessings 🙂
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Lol! Good luck! 😃
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Thank you! I might need a little luck. 😀 These trips are often a little unpredictable, but fodder for all kinds of humor and stories.
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Humour in trying situations shows strength, D. 😄😃
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I accept every word as truth because I had parents that weren’t so far off your description.
By the way, my dad called it ‘playing settlers’. It never amused us
Safe travels and I hope you enjoy this precious time with your parents.
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“Playing Settlers!” Ha ha ha. That’s perfect. I’m glad you could relate, and to be honest, this post wasn’t exaggerated at all. One of these days I’m going to tell my dad that I’m too old for this, but then he’s older than me, so it may not work. All in a day’s fun, Joanne.
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Oh, I knew from personal experience you likely weren’t exaggerating at all … right down to the bleeding eardrums from the volume of the TV. But it was my mom who refused to use her walker because it was for ‘old’ people. At 85, I wondered what she thought she was 🙂
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I think there are probably a lot of us with those stories.
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My grandmother is 93 and has had open-heart surgery in the last year or so. And she still talks about needing to “get out to see her old people”: the folks at the nursing home up the road who are only in their 70s or early 80s.
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You just have to smile at spunk like that!! 🙂
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Ha ha ha. Exactly. My parents don’t want to move to senior housing because of all the old people there. 😀
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Diana, it sounds as though you’ve had wonderful adventures on your breaks. These are my favourite types. Your father sounds like a few men I take breaks with. Life is an adventure; it’s best to live it.
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No shortage of adventures, Diane, and fortunately no one has ever been seriously hurt (except the poor car). I have no idea what’s on the plan for this visit – something sweaty no doubt. 😀 It’s all good.
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Diana, any chance you can sabotage the car (slightly) before the 30th round trip for dead branches…this might ultimately save the Subaru from being wrecked and save your sanity! 😀 Have a lovely trip – they’ll be overjoyed to see you although a pity your brother can’t make it. Good luck with your persuasion…seems all your literary and creative skills be needed to convince them to move! 😀❤️
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I think they’re going to stay there until they’re forced to move. And for now, that’s okay. They’re doing fine. I’m sure I’ll go along with whatever craziness is planned, otherwise my dad will go alone and that is definitely not safe. The adventures never end, Annika. 😀
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Wishing you a safe journey both ways and a secure time in the middle. Don’t have any trees fall on you for instance.
xxx Massive Hugs Diana xxx
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Ha ha ha. Thanks, David. The most dangerous thing would be getting stuck on an old road somewhere and having to walk out for a couple days without getting lost. But that’s unlikely. It will be a fun visit, and no doubt, I’ll be pampered too. 😀
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Enjoy your visit, have fun!
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Thanks, Bibhuti. I usually do have fun, even when we’re doing crazy things out in the bush. It’s a change from the routine and my parents love the visits. All is well. 😀
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Oh! I can’t say I envy you!
My environmentalist self ticked at the dragging of dead branches off federal land, but I guess this will be the least of your worries!
Good luck and big hugs! For when you need them…
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Thanks for the hugs, Dawn!! I actually think it’s legal in some areas to remove downed branches as it reduces the risk of wild fire. My dad is a law-follower, despite his daredevil side. The visit will be fine. I take a deep breath and bring my sense of humor along. 🙂
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It may be legal. It doesn’t mean it’s any better for the environment 😉
Wild fires are a part of nature in those places. It also prevents bugs and other worms from finding a home, disrupts the balance of nature…
but I can think of places around here where it would probably be legal as well. Depending on the proximity to human dwellings for example.
I’m sure the visit will be fine. And it seems like your sense of humour is never very far, so I’m not worried about that!
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I share your concern for the environment and know that leaving the wilderness alone is best. This area has a very low population and most of the people there don’t scavenge for wood. My parents are mountain people and they do things the old way. The biggest issue in Colorado and Utah is natural gas extraction. This beautiful landscape smells and the air quality is poor. It’s a shame.
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I didn’t mean to sound judgemental. I hope you didn’t take my comments as such.
I just know that, too often, humans think that something isn’t necessary in a place, and it doesn’t look tidy with it, so they get rid of it… without realising that nature has its own cycles that we should try and disrupt as little as possible. As far as gas is concerned… that’s just another one of those cycles, that we don’t see because it’s so long, but there too, the least we get involved, the better for everyone… Sigh!
Enjoy your trip. Think of me when you collect the wood 😉
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No problem at all, Dawn. At our place in Oregon we let everything go completely wild and the habitat is full of wildlife. Nature at it best. 😀
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Good luck! Colorado always strikes me as a very beautiful and wild land, so I am totally envious you get to spend two weeks there hauling around part of the landcape. I hope you enjoy your offline time and make many hand-written notes which you can turn into humourous anecdotes upon your return! 🙂
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I hope to do some story brainstorming with the muse and perhaps a little work on a plot. I do those by hand and I’ll have time here and there. It is lovely landscape though hot and dry. I can feel my skin shriveling. Ha ha. Thanks for the good luck!
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Have…um…fun, Diana.
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Ha ha ha. I will try, Mick. It’s always a little nutty, but hey, they’re family. Just gotta go in with the right mindset and keep a sense of humor. Thanks for the well-wishes!
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Ah, Diana, what a fun post! I think you’ll be blessed to have no digital distractions, and I look forward to a thorough report. I am off, too, next Thursday for three weeks in Europe and seven countries. Pray for me!
Looking forward to your return already!
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Wow, you have my little vacation beat, Noelle. What a wonderful trip you have planned – I think you need to lengthen it by a month! Have a wonderful time and safe travels. Bring back photos!
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What fun, Noelle! Enjoy!
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Lol! That seems to be my kind of vacation. It’s nice to take a break from the internet and technology once in a while..I’m excited to hear/read about it when you get back 😊
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I’ll be out in some of your stomping grounds, Bel. My brother moved out of Moab and is in Alaska now, so I won’t get into Utah this trip (other than to fly in). Hopefully I’ll come back with a story or two. 😀
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Yay! can’t wait 😊
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I like your father’s idea of family fun. Have a good time. I could feel the love that you feel for your parents and your family. Only love gives us the sense of humor you showed in this post.
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Thanks, Bridget. They wouldn’t be offended by this post at all, and I’ll probably read it to them. They have good senses of humor and my dad is actually proud of his adventures despite the repeated car-wreckage. That’s all part of the fun, apparently. 😀
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Enjoy the visit. Hopefully there will be wine.
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It’s a dry household, Dan, so no drinking. But that sounds good. I’ll have to sneak in some of those airline mini booze bottles. 🙂 Thanks for the idea. Ha ha.
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Aw, c’mon, now. My grandparents were the driest Baptist folks in town, and they still had the “medicinal whiskey” on the bottom shelf in the basement.
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The deal was that my dad would give up booze if mom gave up cigarettes. They’re going on 6 months of abstinence from their favorite vices. I’m not going to encourage them to cheat, because they will!
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Sounds like great family bonding time. 🙂 Have fun and be safe!
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Thanks, Amy. It’s more fun when my brother is along as I have someone to laugh and commiserate with, but I’ll have a good time with the folks. They’re pretty entertaining in their own way 😀
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Hi Diana, have a great trip – sounds like you’ll be busy, but still! Have a great trip.
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Thanks. Being busy is a great distraction, and there’s always a pile of chores and projects. I laugh and collect the stories for my writer’s treasure chest. 😀
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Ah, adult bonding time. Oh boy. And I say that with much enthusiasm. lol. Enjoy your time with mom & dad. Be safe and no puddle jumping!!! ❤️
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Thanks, Dorinda. My dad thinks the Subaru is an ATV. 😀 And the distances out there are huge, so getting stuck on these old dirt roads is always a concern. And an adventure. Just gotta laugh.
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Well, if you’re not laughing, I’m pretty sure you have the rest of us doing it!! LOL
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Oh my word! Hilarious! I’m all for unplugging once in awhile but… LOL! Anyway, I’m sure you’ll have a story to tell upon return. Be careful and don’t get hurt yourself!
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I’m so glad you saw the humor in my coming “break.” Yes, lots of stories to tell. My brother and I have a trunk full. I’ll try not to get hurt or arrested. Ha ha.
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Ha! Bon voyage!
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Your folks seems amazing and I really hope your offline days to be amazing.
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I’ll do my best. They have a nice deck if it’s not too hot. And the countryside is stunning. Always a fun and “interesting” time 😀
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Yeah I can relate to that plus you can have tons of ideas to write about cause no Internet would be distracting you. I hope you have a productive time.
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I might do some story-idea brainstorming if I get a chance. My mom’s vision prevents us from doing much beside talking. And she loves to talk!
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OK but talking is fun too. Hope you enjoy your time.
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HA, safe travels.
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The flying is the worst part for me, Bernadette. Once I’m there, I just laugh and go along with the craziness. It’s all good. 😀
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HA! Sounds like an EPIC vacation. I can’t wait to hear all about it.
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Hopefully not too epic, Allie, though getting “lost” is always likely and there’s no cell service anywhere out there. 😀 Good bonding time!
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The family that goes crazy together, stays together.
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Enjoy your visit Diane…this wall you speak of…never
Mind , hurry back. ❤
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Ha ha ha. Not THE WALL, Holly. Lol. A short little garden wall. My family likes “projects.” My brother is a project fanatic, but that’s another story. 😀
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I love little garden walls, that sounds like fun! Two weeks you say. Bring the tequila. 🙂
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Tequila is perfect for the territory, but I’ll have to stick with the staple beverage in the home… lukewarm instant coffee. (Help me). Ha ha. More stories to tell.
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lol! Run away D…don’t look back.
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That’s the hardest part, believe it or not. The lack of good coffee. 😀
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I can imagine! 🙂
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Sounds awesome. Enjoy. 😊
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It’s awesome and tiring, Brigid, but always worth it. As nutty as my parents are, they’re still my parents and wonderful people at heart. ❤
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Gosh, have fun!
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Thanks, Annette. It’s always an adventure, though of what variety, I never know until I get there 🙂 😀
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Diana, I think you will have a wonderful time and some good laughs.
O.k. , frustrated at times but just imagine how frustrated your father would be sitting in front of a screen tapping all day.:)
Have a great time in that beautiful landscape and bring some pics home.
miriam
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Thanks for the well wishes, Miriam. I’ll have to remember my old camera! It is pretty country and that will be a nice way to take a little break now and then. 😀
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Good luck, I hope you have fun 🙂
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I will try. There usually is some sort of crazy adventure in the plans. 😀
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Have a great break, Diana. All this sounds like fun. Hope you can convince the charming young couple to move to Oregon. 🙂
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I have a feeling that it’s not going to happen until there isn’t a choice – such as my dad being unable to drive anymore. Until then, they do love that country and are fiercely independent. 🙂
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I hope you have a wonderful time. 🙂
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Thanks, Richard. I’m going to need a break to recover from taking a break from my break. 😀
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I remember from last year LOL
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