Farm Animal Limericks

pigs-1507208_960_720

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Complete silliness. I wrote these on the back of my boarding pass during my flight to Utah.

A pig with a style debonaire
Soft-shoed it like Freddie Astaire
Cha-cha and can-can
Still pork in a pan
Thus ended his dance with a flare

Beware of the lecherous goose
His urges are bawdy and loose
Beneath his white feathers
He has studly black leathers
So his charm is a fowl-minded ruse

A feeble and cowardly chicken
Subjected to mean-hearted pickin’
Worked out day and night
Showed up for a fight
And gave those biddies a lickin’

When the summer grows hot and hazy
The cows in the meadow turn lazy
Supine they repose
with udders exposed
and the horny young oxen go crazy

A wily and smart-witted lamb
Professed to the great taste of ham
The hogs had a fit
And away they all lit
So the farmer stewed mutton and ram

A turkey who drank and gobbled
Indulged ’til his red waddle bobbled
He tried a straight strut
And he trotted well, but
In the end, that old turkey just wobbled

158 thoughts on “Farm Animal Limericks

  1. PoetSpeak says:

    Oh, wow, I loved these. Limericks are a great form of poetry. Your piglet pics are super too – so cute!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Fantastic! I have to say I do feel sorry for the animals though!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Very funny. I am curious and have to as this question because that’s what struck me as I was reading. Were you hungry at the time? :o)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Haha love these, I needed some humor today ! 🙂 Thanks Diana.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Val Boyko says:

    Brilliant! Thanks for the grin Diana 😜

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow, you made my day Diana..I really love how you have put a curve lines on my face after reading this.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Mick Canning says:

    Hang on to that boarding pass!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Such a treat to read!! One of the best limericks I’ve ever read!! 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Antonia says:

    Diana, this is so cute!

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Diana, these are so humorous…these light, funny verses brightened up my evening reading time! You are such a gloriously versatile author. xoxo

    Liked by 2 people

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